I have noticed recently, going thru my website stats, it seems you the audience love the blogs full of drama and are not so interested in the mundane realities of cruising life. This does not, nor will ever, shape what I write though. I will not whore myself out for any audience. I have this old thing called integrity, you might have heard about it on TV long ago. Today’s blog is about my last week and it has been lovely calm and peaceful, although I have lost my voice. I am going to just write about a bunch of little things in my world this past week…. cause you know…  I get to write whatever I want into my journal.   🙂

 

Solo Sailing

I think it was a week ago today that I solo sailed from Barbuda back to Antigua, back to the “mainland” as the locals would say. I had chosen a lovely weather window and mother was in a gentle mood that day. With winds in the range of 13-18 knots from the east, traditional trade winds, and a sea state between 3-6 feet on average, the sailing was lovely, as far as sails can go. The total sail took me about 6 hours from anchor up to anchor down and safe again.

I was thinking more about how, with my heart condition, I have to suffer thru passing out to go solo sailing. I wonder about all the myriad of different ways people could chose to perceive this crime I commit weekly. I have spoken about the people who recently tried to get the authorities to intervene and stop me from solo sailing. I do have friends that worry for me and advise me “… hey Lexi… this is really dangerous for you…”, and they have all love and kindness in their voice.

 

 

I think the way I see it, after thinking about this a lot, is more like sailing with a disability, I guess. If I was a solo sailor chic with one leg everyone would say how brave and strong that woman is for overcoming her disability. I kind of view my life as me overcoming my disability. Although I have never ever considered myself a disabled person, as I am an extremely powerful conqueror, I do all this by overcoming the limits of my physical medical condition. Don’t we all have to overcome things in life?

Last week I raised the anchor alone, as usual and, with a lot of room around me to let my yacht drift, I was able to get my anchor stowed without rushing, which means without passing out. My happy little 40 year old VolksWagon Rabbit Diesel 4 banger engine started and ran without any issues and I motored my way out past the reefs and shoals towards deeper water. Having conquered my fears I only had to deal with the knot of nervous tension I always feel when facing the ocean alone.

 

 

I got my mainsail raised and set, first reef in, without losing consciousness so I was proud of myself. I am getting better at walking the balance between the needs of the boat and the needs of my body, sometimes the boat just has to wait. I got about 70% genny pulled out and did not pass out until I was reefing on the genny winch to sheet in and trim my genny. By then I was a few miles away from the anchorage and exposed to the ocean swell. The up and down combined with the physical exertion put me out for a short while, no big deal.

The sail was, well… what sailing is always like… a boring time while your body takes a beating from the G-forces of the motion up and down and all around. The good news is that it seems this time I was having a good heart day, and did not see too many waves up near 3 meters high, so I had no problems with my tummy, no vomiting or issues at all. My heart did go all fibrilatey a few times, as it sometimes does when trying to adapt and regulate to the constant changes in gravitation pull, but never did it make me vomit or pass out. I sailed along like a pro.

 

 

Of course I would never waste the fishing opportunity, for it is kind of like a crime to NOT at least try to get free food out here. Sometimes I do not fish when I calculate that I am in no position or mood to deal with a catch if I make one, like during storms, rough sailing, or when I am about to get busy dealing with the yachts needs.

The little green lure that I use is just the TUNA bomb, goodness I love this thing. I know I told you I had lost it last sail, and I did, but being a smart Captain obsessed with having backups I had a spare one in my tackle box.

Probably an hour into my sail I hooked a nice sized tuna, about 20 inches long weighing maybe 5 pounds or something. I reeled it in and let it drag beside the boat, mouth out of the water, for a minute. This is my new fish killing plan that a local told me about. Emotionally I feel terrible about killing anything, I still cry, but the suffocating approach seems.. hmm…  seems like less brutal to me, less emotionally disturbing. So by the time I actually lifted the fish into the cockpit it was not moving.

I reset the line back into the water and took the tuna down below to my galley sink. There I decided to bleed it out in the sink and de-gut it, and cut its head and tail off. I have decided recently the meat on these smaller tuna is too soft to fillet them easily so I now cook them “sort of whole”, minus the head and tail.

 

 

Less than an hour later I get another hit on the fishing rod. This time as I am reeling it in, it suddenly makes a run for it and starts spooling out my line, I wonder if it is another barracuda. I get the fish reeled in near the boat and I can see it is another tuna, go Lexi Go..!

Something does not seem right though… there is something wrong with its tail. The tail is broken, cuts are streaming blood along its body. Yep… a shark attacked it as I was reeling it in..! I am beginning to worry about the frequency of sharks attacking my fish out here, like is there a lot of sharks in the shallows between Barbuda and Antigua..?

Of 4 fish I caught in a single week in this stretch of water… 2 for sure were attacked by a shark as I was reeling them in. The third one is unknown… either I hooked a big fish or maybe… just maybe I hooked a normal fish that fully got removed by a shark, and only 1 fish came in to the boat in 1 piece. I am beginning to wonder… if your boat sank here or you fell overboard here… and you were floating along in your lifejacket… could you float 12 hours without getting attacked by a shark yourself? I think I am highly motivated to never find this out. There seems to be a lot of sharks in these waters.

MUST NOT EVER FALL OFF THE BOAT…!

Got it.

What began to disturb me though was that as I held the fish up for a picture, I didn’t realize it was actively bleeding everywhere, and it began to thrash about, splattering me and the whole cockpit with blood…!   Yuck yuck and super yuck. It was a terrible scene. I started thinking that if the police really are still looking for me, and find me when I arrive back in Antigua, on a yacht covered in blood… it could look bad for me.   :0

I sailed outside the St. John’s commercial area, went wide, to avoid having to spot and dodge the buoys placed randomly all over there. When I have crew to sit up on the coaming and help spot them I take the short cut, but alone, not worth the risk of hitting one. So I sailed a mile further west to avoid the whole area.

I am actually an amazing Captain and very capable sailor and I did a great job plotting a good course and ducking into the wave protection of the mountains at an appropriate place. The rest of the sail to Jolly Harbour went smooth lovely and easy. I got my sails down alone about a mile outside of the anchorage, well less than a mile, because… you know… who would want to motor a whole mile to get in..?   🙂

I only passed out once getting the sails down. So only went lights out twice the whole sail, I am getting better. I passed out when I was furling in the Genny, manually with brute force. Somehow big strong Brendan could not do it manually but I can, I just have to put my whole body into it. Like lift with my legs. Sometimes in light conditions I prefer to furl the genny this way as it is much much faster than doing it on the winch. When I winch it in, it goes so slowly, and you have to crank the winch handle for like 2 minutes to get the genny in, it often takes more total energy than just sucking it up and hand pulling the furling line. This brute force did put my lights out though.

 

 

When I came back from the land of twinkly white spots WildChild was motoring herself in towards the back of the anchorage all happy and fine without me. As I came in to anchor, looking for my favorite spot in the lee of the southern tip of the overlooking mountain, I was pleased there were only 4 other boats in here. Having lots or room to solo anchor is a good thing. I did not drop my hook in the exact spot I intended to, she started to drift off sideways before I could get the hook down. I did get my girl safely on the hook though and have enjoyed a lovely week near civilization again.

 

Need to dive the hull soon

I know that I will need to dive and scrape my hull soon. When I dove it in Barbuda to check it out, she was amazingly clean from all growth, except… the evil barnacles. It seems nothing deters them.

I want to spout off about how much I love the bottom paint I used. I know I did complain bitterly about the exorbitant rip off pricing of the local Budget marine for the paint, but goodness it really was the best paint to use. You have to understand that down here in the bathwater warm tropical waters of the Caribbean, stuff grows on everything amazingly fast. A dinghy left in the water a week or two could get so covered in marine growth it needs to be scrapped. Sailboats with crappy anti-fouling need to scrape an entire lawn of green off their hulls once a month.

This stuff from SeaHawk paints called island 44 is not available for sale in Canada or the US, it is way too toxic to pass environmental standards up there. Also you can buy a glass bottle of extra additive toxins to stir into the paint you bought to make it extra resistant to marine growth.

I LOVE THIS STUFF…!

 

 

WOW…. as quickly as the time has passed, WildChild was relaunched 6 months ago already. In the last 6 months I have only dove my hull, (to scrape barnacles) once. These images are of my hull a week ago with only 1 scrapping in 6 months…!    It is AMAZING how effective this paint is.

If only the chemists could find a way to deter those freaking barnacles?

But I am starting to regrow a thin layer of barnacles again and I should remove them now while they are still tiny. As they get bigger they can actually eat into your fiberglass. Did you know that the “glue” barnacles secret to stick to your boat has a binding strength of like 1600lbs per square inch..!   stronger than super glue..!

So it is wise to remove them while they are still small.

I worry though, diving my hull has / does/ and will cause me to pass out underwater so it is very dangerous for me to do alone. When I flip upside down to scrape my rudder and keel, being inverted causes me to vomit underwater and pass out. Like all the time. So super dangerous for me to do alone. Usually I ask my crew to do these parts for me, and I scrape the flat bottom while swimming on my back, not so risky for me, but as I have no crew… I will be doing it all alone soon.

I hope I don’t die cleaning my hull soon.

 

Searching for Crew

Ohh…  this is going to be a bit of a tirade… so skip it if you don’t like hearing me spout off.

Land people.

Honestly I do not understand land people anymore. I always joke around and take the blame for the missed communication connects I have with land people… but really its not me. I joke that I am crazy and going ferral… but honestly… if you ever meet me and actually spend time with me to get to know me you will see that I am very intelligent educated civilized and kind. Like Joe used to say Lexi is not as crazy as she projects herself to be.

Land people are idiots. Like honestly I think at least half of you must be actually nuts… or stupid beyond my ability to grasp. If you could read the emails I get or comments from trolls it might shock you.

I have had ads on 3 different websites searching for crew ever since Brendan got the boot almost 2 months ago. I do understand that with Covid and travel restrictions it is very very difficult to find crew anymore.  I am not in a unique position on this. Yet still I try.

I place a polite, forward, upfront ad in various crewing websites and I deal with the responses I get.

This amazes me… like I just do not understand anymore…

You land people live for schedules… like… love to schedule your lives way into the future…

I have posted ads clearly looking for crew NOW… help as soon as possible.

I get replies from people who say things like…

“…wow this sounds like an amazing opportunity… I would love to do it… but I have a job I cannot leave…”  big question is then… why are you looking for crew positions if you have zero ability to do it…?  Like why apply for a job you know you cannot take..?   So stupid…

“…wow this is great… sounds wonderful… so next year from June 12th to June 21st can I schedule to come crew for you…?”  I am not a free charter… if you want to charter a yacht pay the $10,000 per week and they will happily revolve around your schedule… what makes you think I am a free charter company who exists just to serve your scheduled needs…? 

“… why are you out there sailing when you should be home for covid safety..” Why are you replying to crew ads on a website if you believe everybody should stay home..?  and why the fuck do you waste my time by emailing me your opinion..?  what in the world makes you think your opinion matters to anyone…?  and why the hell do you think I give a shit about what your opinion is… and I am home asshole…!

“…Can I bring my large dog and my girlfriend…?” ummm…   I thought I was pretty clear… it’s right there… single person… and what makes you think a dog would ever be allowed to “be crew” on a yacht? 

“… Can I come on May 15th and have you deliver me to St. Martin by May 17th..? “ ohh… right… I forgot that I am a free water taxi service… why on earth would I bring my sailboat to St. Martin on your schedule only to be stuck alone there…?  How does this help me in the long run? 

or one of my favorite ones…

“… I have zero sailing experience, no skills and no ability, I do not cook or clean or take orders… I might get seasick… can I stream netflicks on the boat using your cell service… it’s not dangerous on the ocean is it?…. “  Wow… wow on so many levels… what the hell is wrong with young people.

AND…. SO MANY PEOPLE ASKING TO SCHEDULE CREWING TIME MONTHS OR YEARS INTO THE FUTURE…!  as though they are planning a charter or vacation…! Like nice lovely people who simply ignored the big letters in my ad “NEED CREW NOW” and just think well it doesn’t hurt to schedule something for a time that is convenient for me?  SCHEDULE… schedule… schedule..? What is this land word?

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE…?

SO MANY DREAMERS… SO FEW DO’ERS

This is the big thing that separates us ocean dwellers from you land people. You are afraid of the open unknown, of leaping out into the unknown and wandering around by the seat of your pants, ever at the mercy of the chaotic universe. You are not brave. Sailors got past these animal needs for safety and security and jumped anyway. I guess there is a reason some people crew and some people own yachts and are captains. The divide between the dreamers and the do’ers. The brave and the cowards.

The exciting news is though despite two months a wading thru dreamers and the deluded… I have finally found crew. There is a nice girl named Victoria from Hawaii that should be arriving here at the end of May. If things go well, fingers crossed, I can train her and she will stay long enough to help me get down to Grenada before hurricane season.

I hope

 

Real Danger Out Here

So I was visiting with my new land people friends here in Antigua a few days ago, lovely people, when she gets this post on her Facebook account…

 

It seems that recently… like a few days ago… this yacht.. much like mine… washed up on the south east shore of Montserrat under the volcano. You can see it is rigged as if storm sailing, sails up… crew gone. Probably a solo sailor like me… sailing very near me, I can see Montserrat from where I am right now, probably either fell off or pirates or really fucked up. I do not know what the story is… it seems right now nobody does and the police are investigating… but clearly this is a bad thing.

BAD THINGS REALLY DO HAPPEN OUT HERE ALL THE TIME

THE DANGER IS VERY REAL

This stuff scares the living crap out of me… because I know full well… there but by the grace of God go I 

I hope they find this guy alive.

I hope pirates didn’t get him.

 

Lost my Voice

I did not release a YouTube video this week. When I sat down to make it on Sunday I discovered I had lost my voice. It seems… having spent two weeks alone without speaking… then coming to shore and socializing a lot for two days with various friends… wrecked my vocal chords. You all know I have a raspy voice on a good day. Friends know I had a surgery on my vocal chords to remove a cyst years ago that has left my vocal chords scarred and damaged. So my scarred up vocal chords could not tolerate me suddenly talking for 2 days. Thus I have been nearly mute for the last few days.

 

 

The good news is.. no voice is needed to sit alone and enjoy the sunsets out here. No voice needed to dance on deck in the dark afterwards either. This sunset a few days ago was spectacularly full of pink colors, which we all know Captain Lexi is pink obsessed.

 

Super Provisioned

Here is another fun story.

So yesterday I was going thru my super stash of toilet paper under the bathroom sink. Remember a year ago at the beginning of Covid everyone was panicking about toilet paper. Not understanding what had gone wrong with the world, I was in Montserrat and dutifully got Covid prepared and stocked up on toilet paper.

Well it seems… under all that toilet paper… I had buried a Wal-Mart bag full of shampoo and conditioner, and I have not seen a Wal-Mart since Puerto Rico before Covid. 

So funny… my yacht is so super well provisioned for the apocalypse that even I do not remember all that I have or where I put it all.

A sailboat is a tiny home so it always amazes me when I lose stuff onboard or find stuff I had no idea I had on board. Its not a big home.

 

Need to Renew my Visa

This is a bit of a tirade too. I need to renew my 90 days visa before Friday, it expires this Sunday. I went to the trouble of walking into the customs and immigration office a month ago, last time I was in Falmouth, and specifically ask them what do they want me to do to renew it.

They were very clear… just email us.. at the same email address you used last time.. and make an appointment. I asked clearly… how long in advance should I email to get an appointment..?  They clearly said they were not too busy so a week in advance should be good enough.

I have been emailing them everyday since last Sunday (May 16th) and they cannot be bothered to respond. I have even emailed both email addresses I have for them. Everyday.. sometimes twice a day… and it seems they cannot be bothered to check their emails or respond.

My current Visa expires this Sunday (May 23rd) and it does not seem possible to make an appointment with them. So I guess tomorrow I am probably going to have to sail down there so I can just show up in their office Friday and submit myself to whatever crazy and stupid things they might choose to say or do.

I cannot make them either do their jobs or do their jobs effectively… but this is the gate and they are the gate keepers. I am sure the first thing they are going to say is..  “…do you have an appointment..?   why didn’t you schedule an appointment…?   you have to schedule an appointment first… just email us… we cannot help you if you don’t have an appointment…”  But perhaps I am too jaded by the world… I have lost my hopeful innocence and expectation of goodness I was raised with in Canada. So far though most of my dealing with the authorities here have been pleasant though, so here is to hoping Antigua civility wins out.

So I am probably sailing to Falmouth tomorrow to stand in their office and face the bureaucratic stupidity with a charming smile behind my covid mask, wearing my nicest clothing you understand, appearances are very important to them here not competence.

 

 

It kind of amuses me that when I sat down to write this two hours ago I did not have too much to say, thought this would be a very short blog this week. Somehow my life is never as boring as I think it is. Always something going on out here in the ocean. And I skipped a whole bunch of stuff about my week. I left all my personal socializing with friends out of it.

 

Cheers Sailors and sailing fans

 

Wild Captain Lexi

 

… all good and calm this week …